Posts Tagged ‘Not-running’

Taking ACTION!


INJURY DURATION: Eternity

PAIN LOCATION: Left kneecap region.

PAIN ON A SCALE OF 1-10: 2

OTHER SYMPTOMS: Obsessive elliptical use

HURTS WHEN I: ONLY WHEN I RUN.  Nothing else.  Really.  I walk, jump, squat, etc. …and it’s FINE.  I jog for 3 minutes on a treadmill and it hurts.  Go flippin’ figure.

HURTS SORT OF WHEN I: <see above>

DOESN’T HURT WHEN I: <again.  see above.>

TREATMENT:

1) Ice.  Ice ice ice.  The frostbitten patch on my knee is now hardened and keratinized and all funky-feeling.  It’s kind of cool.

2) Mad Men.

3) Obsessive thesis work.

4) Calling an orthopedist to get this crap taken care of.

4.5) …which necessitated a call to the nice people at United Healthcare.  Shirley explained to me my benefits, because understanding and seeking health care is one of those “adult” things I’m not yet able to do, along with doing taxes, going on a date with a man who doesn’t just annoy the sheer hell out of me, and going a full day at work without saying something mildly inappropriate but ridiculously funny, which is how I justify it when a word like “boobies” comes flying out of my mouth in professional company.

5) Education.  I showed you all a helpful diagram yesterday, but The Bear sent me a more comprehensive knee illustration to better show me how to treat my condition:

Knee

We are awed, The Bear.

…so I need to put ice on the boner, so it doesn’t keep grinding on the boner, which is also going to cause some pain, naturally, to the boner when it bends against the boner.  I get it now!

Seriously, this is all really depressing.  I think I’m taking a few days off from even thinking about it.

Signing off for a few,

DJ

…and there was much rejoicing.


20 hops!  On the left foot!  Which is the foot just below the (formerly?) injured knee!  And no pain!  Success, dear readers!  Let’s go get BLASTED!

We GOT this…


INJURY DURATION: 7 days

PAIN LOCATION: Left kneecap region.

PAIN ON A SCALE OF 1-10: 2

OTHER SYMPTOMS: Waxing and waning senses of hope, a general “fat” feelingthatIhatetoadmitbutit’strue from not running for a week.  I speak truth, people.  It’s my blog, after all.

HURTS WHEN I: …actually doesn’t hurt a lot!  POW!

HURTS SORT OF WHEN I: walk down stairs.

DOESN’T HURT WHEN I: bake.

TREATMENT: ice, stairmaster, stationary biking, watching “Inglourious Basterds,” writing half-assed blog entries.

DOOOOSH!


WEATHER: 35-ish, rainy, miserable.

MILES: HOW MANY?  Zero.  That’s how flippin’ many.

MILES THIS WEEK: 66.5

MILES THIS MONTH: 124

WHERE TO: <growl>

MOOD: Hateful

ADDITIONAL NOTES:

“Dooooooosh!” was the noise I heard this morning as a truck plowed through a mud puddle and coated me in whatever nastiness lurks in DC potholes.  Getting-splashed-by-a-passing-car is one of those iconic “girl-in-the-big-city” images that is much less madcap and carefree and comedic than it appears on TV sitcom credits and much more homicide-inspiring, really.

Of course, my kickass knee injury didn’t help the situation, and I continued wandering to church, now in a coat heavy with chock-full-of-TB-and-scabies puddle water in addition to the dull ache in my left knee.  The mere fact that I went and sat through an hour-and-a-half church service even while wet and dirty and tired and hurt I think entitles me to one free healing-zap from Jesus’ magic finger.  Please direct it at my left patella, yo.

But I did go buy some ibuprofen, a knee elastic compression thingy, and super-ultimate-feel-better-juice (a.k.a. Diet Coke) after church and call the-most-comforting-person-ever (a.k.a. Mom), who pointed out that at least this is happening now and not in March or April.  True enough.  And I can probably withstand training on an elliptical machine for a few days.  Also true.  So.  The old Rest-Ice-Compression-Elevation-Thesis-work-Cry rotation might be what I’m up to for a few days.  <grrrr.>

(Also in that Midwestern-it-could-always-be-worse vein, and also in an I-hope-this-doesn’t-sound-too-sanctimonious vein, my housemate (who is a do-gooder and knows a lot about these things) says that these people are awesome.  Donate money to Haiti.  OK.)

Bah!


WEATHER: <shrugs>

MILES: 0

MILES THIS WEEK: 32

MILES THIS MONTH: 89.5

WHERE TO: Nope.

MOOD: Sleepy.

ADDITIONAL NOTES:

Uh-uh.

Day 1 — SUCCESS!


WEATHER: 40 degrees F.

MILES: 0.

MILES THIS WEEK: 0.

MILES THIS MONTH: 0.

MILES THIS YEAR: 0.

MOOD: Defiant.

TYPE OF RUN: Lying supine on floor, kneading stomach to facilitate digestion of excessive cookie dough consumption.

ADDITIONAL NOTES:

I did not run today.  I consider this a mark of pride, or at least I can rationalize as such.  I mean, there are all these fools out there who made big fat new year’s’ resolutions to run more, and so they went out running today.  They might go running tomorrow, depending on how much they’re doing the I-haven’t-run-since-the-Clinton-administration waddle.  They will roll over in bed on Sunday morning and say something about how it’s the Sabbath and Jesus/God/Yahweh/Allah/Earth Mother/Buddha/<secular humanist deity/Christopher Hitchens> doesn’t run on Sundays, right?  Right.  And so it will go.  But those people?  They are running today.

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